Moods, Meds and Meals

an eating disorder recovery and mental health blog

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  • Bipolar Disorder
  • Eating Disorders
  • Mental Health and Wellbeing
Thanks for stopping by everyone 🩷 I always felt compelled to act on what anorexia told me because the consequences didn’t feel worth it if I didn’t - I’d feel panicky, sad and ashamed. But I vividly remember my therapist saying to me “nobody has a gun to your head stopping you from putting the spoon in your mouth”. It was direct but powerful. He was right. Nobody was forcing me to behave in ways that aligned with being ill. I had the choice whether to listen or not. So gradually I stopped listening. I’ve had a couple of treat days in the park recently which have been nice and it’s been good to enjoy the sun without it being too dangerous to take Beau out in it. It’s okay to take medication!! I know it can cause some shame and worry, and I know there’s a lot of misinformation and disinformation out there about it. But it’s okay to do what you need to do to stay alive. Postpartum mental illness is such a rollercoaster. If I’m not sad I’m hypomanic, if I’m not hypomanic I’m anxious, just in endless loop over and over again. I feel like I can’t settle the seesaw. Postpartum mental illness is something people consider to be so shameful but that shouldn’t be the case. You’re more likely to struggle with it if you have pre-existing difficulties, buts it’s an extremely vulnerable time for all women and can strike anyone. I’ve been really struggling with buying clothes since I had a baby. Most clothes I own don’t fit me but some do and it really hit me how hard it is trying to dress for a body that is constantly a different size, even in the same shops. I attach so much value to the number in my clothes and one of the things that has been the hardest with regards to accepting a new body is buying clothes in sizes I’ve never been before. I can’t buy anything on Vinted, for example, because I’m spread across different sizes. I went through my wardrobe and realised I’m currently wearing clothes in an XS and also a L. How can this be possible? My body isn’t drastically changing size every morning. Reintroducing this little guy! 💅🏼
Posts by CaraLisette
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